They get to the beach when they get to the beach

“Heart to Heart: The Path to Wellness” (published 2015) is an extraordinary collection of true-life experiences written from the hearts & minds of more than 40 inspiring authors. We created this book because we know there are many journeys for the mind, body& spirit, & so many life lessons for us to explore, heal, & grow from.
Tracey Ha’aoLakainãpali joins Älska publishing as a contributing author in the bestselling ‘Heart to Heart’ series alongside industry thought leaders Dr. John Demartini and Bob Doyle, both whom were featured in ‘The Secret’. Here you will find her inspiring story “They Get To the Beach When They Get To the Beach”.  She shares events of her life’s journey of 54+ years (at the time of writing the chapter) ‘Path of Wellness’ with humour , insight and through the wisdom of a fragment of Hawaiian spirituality.  Her 30+ years of active studies and professional life in many modalities of health, wellness and spirituality have provided her with empowering insights that she readily shares. Her path has lead her to simply Living Aloha & Being Pono. As a lomilomi practitioner, teacher and forever student of Hawaiian healing and cultural practices, she provides opportunities to make that journey to the beach a little smoother 😉

 Tracey’s Chapter:

Dedicated to Kumu Mahealani Kaiwikuamo’okekuaokalani Henry, Kumu Elele o Na Kūpuna

I have a vivid memory of a photo taken of me as a baby laying in my cot, laughing, gurgling, and . . . well, glowing. I remember my mother and grandmother reminiscing on many occasions about what a happy baby I was. That I rarely cried. Just smiled and happily gurgled. They indeed wondered that something might be “wrong” with me because, apparently, not crying was unusual for babies. On reflection now, from the adult who has journeyed long and far, I now know this to be the beginning of what was simply a life “path of wellness” for me.

Hawaiians teach that each of us is born as a pure bowl of light. That as we grow, stones are placed in our bowl and gradually dim our light, if we allow it. It’s all about our choices. We can choose to keep the metaphoric stones in there, or we can toss them out. Choices. We can allow all the old hurts, memories, self-diminishing thoughts, and events that the stones represent to fill our bowl, or we can choose to take the positive learnings and let go of those stones.

Wellness for me has always been a life choice of health—physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. It’s not a destination. Wellness is a way of being, of living daily. Now, that’s not to say that during this journey of wellness I haven’t experienced blips on the radar. I most certainly have! It comes with being a human! However, when one of these blips occurs, such as the melanoma I manifested many years ago, I never let it become more than that. No meteorites wanted here. My immediate reaction is “What was I thinking?!” Literally, what was I thinking that created this? Being accountable for my thoughts and my actions. I know that my thoughts and words form my world, my reality 24/7. If I’m not enjoying the world or the reality I’ve created, it’s up to me to change it.

After the melanoma was surgically removed on the same day it was diagnosed, Annie Lennox singing Thorn in my Side kept playing in my head. Then I realised why. Oh, those “light bulb” moments! That’s how I had been referring, some years prior, to a former partner—as “just a thorn in my side”. Ouch! What a clear manifestation of that thought—the melanoma representing “the thorn”! Ooh, time to toss that stone out of the bowl!

My journey of this lifetime has enjoyed the experiences of the rich diversity of many spiritual practices. The Hawaiian cultural and spiritual ways of living are what I strive to embody. Aloha and pono. Hawaiian words have deep complexity, so simply put—love, compassion, ethics, and integrity. Their often used analogy of our journey to paddling a canoe is a reference filled with so much depth and wonderful imagery. We are all in charge of our own canoe. We are each responsible for whether or not we paddle and the direction we take. Do we paddle blindly or look for the signs? When the paddling gets a little rough or when we find we have been paddling in circles, do we give up, throw the paddle overboard, jump out, and hope that someone will jump in after us and save us?

As a practitioner and teacher for over twenty-five years, and as someone who sees the spirit greatness and potential in every person, I had become a master of jumping in after people and endeavoring to stop them from drowning. Anyone would think I was trying out for the spiritual remake of Baywatch! Then last year another of those many light bulb moments came. My physical body was experiencing painful inflammation, and I was exhausted. Not a familiar feeling for me. I’m used to being the ‘Energizer Bunny ’whose battery just keeps on going. Due to overextending myself and my time, I had allowed myself to become depleted on many levels and had allowed some joyfulness and magic moments to dim a little. My being had some rust setting in. I had forgotten to be that gurgling, joyful baby. I had allowed others to deposit their stones in my bowl.

Time for me to sit still for a moment in my canoe, look at the stars, correct the course, and change direction. Ho’opono pono ke ala—make right, more right the path. Everything is I ka pono mea—in perfection, right place, right time, right being. That’s why I’ve never really understood the question “Are you a person who is a glass half empty or half full?” I believe it’s always full. It just keeps expanding to accommodate more joy, opportunities, and desired experiences. We simply have to remember to be in the joyfulness and aloha of every moment. The time had come for me to get a shiny, new, really big glass.

I embraced the learning and understanding that some people who come into my life, whether as family, friends, clients, students, or acquaintances, actually choose to stay in the M.E. of “Many Excuses”—rather than the M.E. of “Magical Events and Experiences”. All I can show them is where to look, point out the stars to aim for; however, I have to let them paddle at their own pace. Nor can I tell them what to find or how to find it. All I can be is a living, shining example of what I know. To the knowledge and wisdom of my path, my journey. Valuing (yep, that’s been a big one), my time, knowledge, wisdom and journey. To speak and shine my truth.

It’s not my responsibility, nor is it my right, to try and drag anyone into a canoe that they don’t want to be in. Regardless of how powerful, profound, extraordinary, and magical that canoe might be. Regardless of the potential and greatness I see in them, they have to find it themselves, in their own way. I discovered there actually is such a thing as giving out too much Aloha to others, when they actually didn’t want to receive it or didn’t see themselves worthy of receiving it.

In doing that, I also recognized it was time to allow them the choices of their journey, regardless of the stormy seas I could foresee for them. Once I honoured their choices and stepped away from their canoes, which were sinking with the weight of their stones, the inflammation left my body and the energy returned. It was time to refuel myself with the Alohas.

A client shared with me a few months ago a quote she had come across by Anne Lamott: “Lighthouses don’t go running all over an island looking for boats to save; they just stand there shining.” The cartoon visual of me as the lighthouse running all over the island certainly gave me another amusing light bulb moment (no pun intended). I had been that lighthouse, running wide-eyed, arms waving, trying to help them avoid the rocks and light their way to the beach. Yet, still they crashed on those rocks—or, sometimes, even paddled back out and aimed fully for the them!

At the same time, as I had that insight, there were two days when a little pet rabbit that had escaped its enclosure, appeared by the side of the road, happily nibbling grass. Each time, I stopped to try and (yes, you guessed it!) rescue it. Each time, just as I got close enough to pick it up, it would casually hop out of my reach. Recognizing another “sign” when I see one, I dutifully went home, Googled the symbology of rabbits from a spiritual perspective and received the message clearly. By becoming quiet, their inner voice can help guide them to where they need to be. This highly intuitive animal uses her gut to know when it is the right time to take a leap, to spring forward! Quiet that constant mind chatter (not easy for a Gemini!) and listen to that inner voice. This inner guide will give you the confidence you need to take action, take the opportunities, and leap. Needless to say, once I got that message, I never saw the little furry tail again. Take the opportunities that were presenting for me, to not hesitate—to leap. To stop running around and providing opportunities for others that they were not ready or wanting to take. To embrace fully the new magical events and opportunities that were opening up.

So, I became the lighthouse and the rabbit all at once. Staying still, simply shining—and in that stillness also being ready to leap at the appropriate times—I continue to paddle my canoe strong and sure. Remembering with each stroke of my paddle, my own joyful Aloha and gratitude for the journey on my path of wellness. Remembering the wide-eyed joy of that baby photo. Remembering that bowl of light. With a smile, and a deep breath, the phrase that now keeps  playing in my head, regarding everyone who I connect with on my journey is : “They get to the beach when they get to the beach.”

Reviews:
“Your book chapter is brilliant!!!!! It’s very heartfelt & inspirational. It made me laugh out loud, such a pleasure to read. It’s wonderful that Spirit is calling you to share your teachings through writing, you will be able to reach so many more people. Lots more writing opportunities for you coming up!! Here’s the shifts I had through reading your chapter…………..” LH

“Mahalo too for the books..I read your chapter last night…very inspiring & deeply insightful…much learning to draw from in there. Aloha,” Danielle  Feb 2015

“Hello Tracey. I have just received the books Thankyou. It was excellent to read your story as I resonated with the lighthouse and the bunny. Thankyou. I picked a random one next which was www.consciously-in-in-balance.com I can feel that this is a Healing book for everyone. What a gift of sharing and healing. Love you,” Jude Feb 2015